Monday, January 29, 2007

The world stopped spinning and time stood still while my brain tried to grasp the words I just heard...

To all those in my circle:

Over the past couple of days some of you have heard the news about my father. Since I am still in shock and not fully able to grasp the reality of the news I have received, I find that it is easier to post a letter for all of you to read. Last week my father had to go for an upper GI endoscopy and colonoscopy. He told my sister and I that they had removed 6 polyps from his colon, but that everything was ok. He said that he had to go for a CT scan on Friday as a precautionary measure. I had this gut feeling that something was seriously wrong and I remember saying to him, "Daddy, promise me you would tell me if it was serious." He responded, "Baby, I promise you. I wouldn't tell you over the phone though, I would drive down there and tell you to your face." Around five o'clock Friday I got a call from my dad. He asked what my sister and I were doing that night and told me he was on his way from Pigeon Forge to Chattanooga. I immediately knew that something was wrong and insisted that he tell me instead of making me wait 3 hours for him to arrive. It took some persuading (as you all know I can be fairly stubborn), but he finally said to me "Baby, it's cancer." The world seemed to stop spinning and time stood still while my brain tried to grasp the words that he had spoken to me. I asked what stage the cancer was in and he stated that he did not know. They had only told him that he had a malignent tumor in his esophagus, the tumor was so large that his esophagus was almost closed. (He's been having difficulty swallowing, but always said that he had a hernia.) He had an appointment scheduled with the oncologist and surgeon this morning and was supposed to find out what stage the cancer is in. Unfortunately, that is not information we have found out as of now. They were able to tell him that the tumor has grown into his pulmonary artery and is possibly touching the lining of his heart. He has to go on Feburary 8 for a PET scan, MRI on his brain, and pulmonary functions testing to find out how advance the cancer has become. The doctor told him that they will not have the results of the tests until the following week. This is the same type of cancer my Papa (grandfather) lost the battle to and it's hard to imagine going through it all again. It is especially difficult to think about what my grandmother must be going through. My grandfather passed away the day before their 50th wedding anniversary and now, almost 16 years later, she has to hear and deal with the news that her son has the same type of cancer. My sister and I are both still in shock. I alternate between wanting to cry, wanting to throw up, disbelief, and wanting to DO something to make it better. Unfortunately, there isn't anything I can DO...I can only pray and cling tight to hope. He's my daddy and this is so hard....I ask that each of you please pray for him as well. Pray for my grandmother, my aunt, my uncle, my sister, and my entire family. As I receive more news, I will keep you updated. I love you all and thank you for being such an important part of my life!

Always, Melissa

One more thing...To leave you all with some happy news, my sister is 6 months pregnant with my dad's first grandchild. She's having a boy....my daddy has been so excited! We are all so excited! I'm going to be Aunt Lissa!

Saturday, April 22, 2006

I Can't Speak Thunder

My best friends little boy, Ethan, has been at T.C. Thompson for the past several days because of a staph infection in his blood. Despite his physical weakness from the infection his spirit has not been weakened nor has his ability to inspire all of us around him...
His older cousin asked him the question, "Ethan, did you hear the storm last night?" He replied, "Yeah I heard the storm...It was Jesus talkin' to me!" His Papa then asked, "What was Jesus saying?" In the most serious and innocent voice he responded, "I don't know what he was sayin'. I can't speak thunder!"